The Grave

by TSI25   May 28, 2013


He was very Conflicted about his brother.
A fast man
German
prone to drink
and dance and art

and cars
like the one he died in
a long
time
ago

He burned his brother's paintings
in a fire ten feet high -
self portraits, carvings, and ink pastels
colored blots and inky dots
every single one but
he'll never talk about why

His brother was a German
buried in a German plot
being of German Blood
in the early 50s
being on a questionable side
of a lost war.

The plot ran out
as plots will do
and his mother wouldn't renew the rent
on his lonesome
bygone
tomb

So his sister(dead a year now) moved the headstone down
to a mill out in the quiet woods
by her husband
dead and gone

but she left the headstone as she found it

face down

so as to preserve the subtle way it weathered

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Latest Comments

  • 10 years ago

    by AnnaCG

    I really enjoyed this. So simple yet eerie. Well done.:)

  • 10 years ago

    by butterflyqueen

    It's good. Our dreamer certainly didn't lie when she said you are good.

  • 10 years ago

    by Hannah Lizette

    "He was very Conflicted about his brother.
    A fast man
    German
    prone to drink
    and dance and art

    and cars
    like the one he died in
    a long
    time
    ago"

    -- I don't think conflicted needs to be capitalized.

    I like the form of these few words here... you said he was a fast man and then the way you have it worded and formed, it makes the reader read it in a faster pace.

    Speaking of the car he died in, that makes one think he was in a car crash, maybe due to alcohol?

    Third stanza: He sounds bitter towards his brother, it's unknown to you and to the reader. It could just be his way of grieving... or he could've just hated him. I guess no one will ever know...

    I love the line "colored blots and inky dots" ... truly a nice, artistic touch to go along talking about his paintings.

    Fourth stanza: I don't think so many "German" are needed... it was stated in the first stanza that he was German... so I don't think it's necessary...but I'm sure there is some significant reason why you done it that way.

    Fifth stanza: I like the mention of how she didn't renew his rent... it shows that maybe he didn't have a very good relationship with any of his family members...that even in death, he was lonesome.

    Ending: His sister, maybe the only one who cared anymore, moved the headstone to be with the rest of her family...she left it laying face down, maybe as a resemblance to his life, he was always laying face down... due to the drinking, face down in the dirt like he will always be.

    Sad... really a sad story.

  • 10 years ago

    by BlueJay

    Wow. Very descriptive and yet so simple. I like the flow and word choice. Nice oiece Taylor

  • 10 years ago

    by Lemon

    Would I be correct in assuming this is about Hitler?

    • 10 years ago

      by TSI25

      No, you would not. its about my grandfather's brother.

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