We Should Be (alt. version)

by yogi73   Jun 21, 2013


We should be the wind,
Thru the trees
caressing each leaf
gentle and light
also
the sea,
Breaking upon a coast
subduing the rocks
ever demanding more
and
the storm,
Raging and fierce
exciting the air
with electric currents
forever
the sun,
On the soil
bringing life to what
lies beneath

We should be lovers
and love.

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Latest Comments

  • 9 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Its like Ying and Yang, there isn't one without another, a match made to balance nature. I like the meaning in this write and the way you have expressed it...excellent!

  • 10 years ago

    by Timothy

    The writer here clearly has a way with words; each line has an overt and direct effect upon the reader, sweet and sharp in their approach. The pastoral imagery of "wind", "coast" and "storm" are too indicative of the universal beauty that are indicated by the title; I guess, in this respect, the writer encompasses 'everything' natural in order to achieve a sense of complete involvement and so 'universal beauty'.
    The last stanza clarifies these points and provides a feeling of closure; total enjoyment.

  • 10 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    You weave a journey in this piece and also a sense of desire to grab onto life and not waste a second of it.

    Very simply expressed but sometimes that is the best way to get a message across, especially with the last line, like to do only that would be everything in itself that you'd ever need. Keep writing!

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