Judge me

I stumble down the stairs
and sit down in a seat
covering my wrists
as i admit defeat
my best friend shouts to me
baby are you okay
i shake my head and hide my face
not knowing what to say
then she looks at me
that girl i hate ever so
and says so clueless
shes fine, let it go
i stare at her, so lost
and she whispers to her friend
shes always so unhappy
she says that shes depressed
shes so pathetic, honestly
i know she dreams of death
with every word she says
i wish it was my last breath
they all think I'm a freak
filled with suicidal thoughts
but they don't know the real me
hidden by pain of all sorts
my father hits me hard
my mother yells so loud
my brother is a druggie
the other lost among a cloud
i suffer from depression
crazed by this stupid life
so maybe I've tried to end the pain
using that stupid kitchen knife
but I'm just trying to figure out
how to deal with all of this
so don't you judge me by the bad
for its the good stuff that you'll miss