The You I knew once
promised
You’d never give me anything too hard,
to much for me to handle,
to withstand,
to come through.
I had you by my side,
to carry me when my legs didn’t work anymore.
But,
that You and I parted ways -
with promises broken
and a heart torn,
because it become clear
who I am made as
is someone you do not love.
I stopped looking for You.
Then,
Recovery told me I had to find You,
either again or for the first time,
because I could not defeat addiction on my own.
So in my fear and doubt,
I tried to track You down, again.
The new You is strange
is hoped for, and not yet quite believed in.
I need You so I hope you are there.
That’s all I know.
My health is failing,
my heart is breaking,
my fear is shaking,
and I find I am praying
that it’s still true,
that no matter what there is to go through,
I will come out okay.
Again, I seek the promise that You’ll be there,
to help me,
to carry me,
to leave me not alone.
In my needing hour I find myself wanting to pray,
because I want to hope you’ll be here,
and that it’s still true
that I can get through
this,
and anything else
you send my way.
