Dogs And Cats

Dogs And Cats
By Mark Spencer

Hey! What the heck are you doing here??
Get down! You’ll give my position away!
Readers! Can’t you see I’m working here??
See those cats? I’m staking them out today!

Hello. Agent one twelve, code name Fido.
I know, Fido is a stupid name!
It was either that or Huckleberry.
The names you humans give dogs are lame!!

But that’s what I’m called, and I live with it.
My shrink says don’t hold it in anymore;
All that pent up resentment I’m feeling.
So I pee it out on the kitchen floor!

Hah! But enough about me, let’s talk cats!
They’re evil you know; right down to the core!
It’s not enough they get all the good names!
No! With cats it’s always more, more, more!

They want it all people; the whole shebang!
And it’s the dog’s job to prevent that!
That’s where I come in; surveillance is the key.
Dogs keep a close watch on every cat!

History proves how evil cats really are!
Did you know Adolf Hitler had a cat??
Stalin, Castro, Mao, all influenced by cats!
Eva Paron’s was made into a hat!

Saddam had a cat! And he’s still out there!!!
Sure, capture Saddam, but leave the cat!!
Humans! They always think they’re the one’s in charge!
Cats may look cute, but they’re worse than a rat!!

It is only a matter of time people!
Soon the cats will try to take over!
And the only ones standing in their way
Have names like Fido, Spot and Rover!!

Would you excuse me for just a moment?
I feel resentment coming on once more.
I'll just make a quick trip into the house,
So I can pee on the kitchen floor.

Try not to let those cats out of your sight!
Let me know if they meet with any rats.
If you fail you may wake up tomorrow
Living in a world that is ruled by cats!!

That would be the straw that broke the Great Dane’s back!
They get the best names, they sleep on the bed,
They eat canned food; what more do these cats want???
Watch out, and remember what I said!!

Dogs are the only reason you don’t wake up,
In a world of chaos and upheaval!
We deserve better names, and more canned food!
We protect the world from feline evil!!

It’s the least you can do for saving you,
Read my report and look at the stats!
I think we deserve to sleep on the bed,
So let in your dogs and throw out the cats!!

End.