Invisible window

A tear trickles down my cheek
as I stare through the invisible glass.

we're all having fun
and this mood swing
will eventually pass.

Some days I'll wake up happy
some days I'll wake up sad.
Sometimes I treat others like Sh*t
and Immediately I'll feel bad.

I think of stuff
that makes me upset
or puts me on the verge.
Soon and unexpectedly
my suicide will emerge.

But, I'm jealous
because I'm ugly
I'm angry and I don't have a clue.
why I'm always angry
and why I'm always feeling blue.

It's very, very confusing
and very frustrating too.
How I always have these attitudes
toward the ones I love, and you.

It's out of my control
I try to find a way
But my mind seems to be crushing me
and suffocating me everyday.

I try to break this window
but I don't even have the supplies.
The window gets all foggy
as I try to hold back my cries.

But it's too late
and I am weaker
I am about to grab that knife
jab it in my stomach
and therefore end my life.

This window is blocking my help cry
it's causing me so much pain
Do I have a mental illness
or am I simply going insane.

By, Amanda