Roll the dice

Shadows appear as the night slowly falls,
I hide underneath my unanswered calls.
Those calls for help, they never succeed,
for what is not healed, will once again bleed.

"You're worthless, you're useless"
yell the voices in my head,
"Nobody loves you,
they want you dead!"

The razorblade calls, it calls on me,
"Come here, now, beautiful, I will set you free!"

"Nobody loves you, yes, it is true,
nobody loves you, only I do!
Here is what you'll do: You'll roll the dice,
let the numbers show you how many times you shall slice.
Shows it one, you cut two,
cut the double of what it shows you!
Cut it now, cut it deep,
fall into perfect, everlasting sleep....
Do it now, you know you're supposed to,
do it now, you know you want to.
Crimson is beautiful, so clench your fists,
let my sharp edges draw on your wrists.
You know I'm the only friend you've got,
so trust me when I say it won't hurt a lot.
Don't let them judge you by what comes from within,
let them judge you by the beauty on your skin...
- it's not a sin."

I grab the blade
as I prepare to slice,
just one single cut...
it won't be my demise...
"No!" I yell,
"I am more than this,
I do not want to feel your
tainted kiss!"

"Silly, little girl!
The blade is right there!
I'm the only one you've got,
I'm the only one that cares...
Do you seriously think
you're something without me?
I am your future,
your destiny!"

Mascara tears fall,
they fall like rain,
I turn around to hide
my silent pain.
I am sick of dealing
with all these cries,
and once again I've fallen
for the good old lies.
So, congratulations, you've succeeded,
you've made me feel like dirt,
I fall to the ground
as drops of blood stain my shirt.

©

; The part with the dice was inspired by a book I read; about a man that relied on a dice ;