Ex-"friend"

I’m such a failure,
But I know there is no cure.
I guess I should try to go on with my life.
But it is so hard to forget all this strife.

It would be easy if I could just stop thinking.
That would be as hard as and alcoholic to stop drinking.
But I know my brain does not work that way.
I guess this is the price I’ll have to pay.

I thought every thing was going great.
But that was before I made my big mistake.
I was just getting comfortable around you,
But I knew that was to good to be true.

To you I owe a lot.
About what? You probably forgot,
All you said,
That made me want to get out of bed.

I’m not trying to put you down,
But all of this is making me frown.
I’m very distraught,
For the thoughts I’ve thought.

I know that things are never going to get back to normal.
I just wish I had an illness that was terminal.
That way you would not have to suffer
And my face I would not have to cover.

I’m so ashamed
I start to break down when I hear your name.
I hope you hate me,
Cuz that is the way it should be.

I guess this is the end,
To my “ex”-friend.

*please comment/vote. Thanx*