Tired Words That Kill

Ripping out my tongue and bleeding from my throat
Holding back the words inside to swallow them and choke

Fighting to keep them hidden behind silence and sad eyes
Showing you a smile, putting up a fake disguise

Tearing at the hairs standing straight up on my face
I've got to put you where you belong, back in your place

Sifting through and filtering the words that I should say
Hoping there's a better find, a calmer, safer way

Avoiding every opportunity that screams for me to tell
Drowning out every bellow, cursing this damned spell

Crawling on my knees, trying to avoid your dark stare
Telling myself its not right, by the way that you don't care

Tracing over outlines of the story that we've created
Betting on the ending, though the evidence is dated

Calling from exhausted lungs to a future I can't for see
Fading in a dying grasp that once supported me

Torturing my mind with the words I cannot shout
Twisting around my beaten teeth, trying to spill out

Careless insecurities, afraid of how you might react
The opportunistic moment shows, but I shadow and retract

Mouth and mind so bloody from pain of bashing words
Now stagnant in my open mouth, there's no way to be heard

Bruises inside my mind, I swear I once knew how to speak
These dry words sucked into pores and buried themselves deep

The pace of my heart begins to quicken as I breathe to start
Yet, I pause in waiting, letting these words tear me apart