Eve Angel #2

by Daniel Fink   Mar 30, 2005


You’re the only one I can call my true love,
You have more beauty than a dove,
You’re the only one I love with all my might,
It will never change day or night,
When I see you my heart gets to bouncing,
My soul gets to pouncing,
You’re smile is brighter than a suns ray,
When I see it I don’t know what to say,
But all I know is that it takes my breathe away,
When I am not with you I look at the nights ski,
Sometimes it makes me cry,
Cause I always see your face in those stars,
Your love for me heals all my past time scars,
So i hold you close & take your embrace
Please tell me no one else can take my place ,
Oh Baby your kisses are like fire,
Your all I will ever desire,
Well this is the end but remember,
Baby you have my internal soul,
You’re the only one that makes me whole.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Georgi

    Awww this is beautiful. the first thing i picked up on was the childlike rhyme like love and dove, that is overused in the poetry world but u used it nicely, was refreshing because it backed up the whole idea of the poem, its LOVE and sometimes love it childish and immauture and naive. Its wonderful =]
    For another poem that isnt about love, if u want to write something on a topic which isnt as childlike as love or infatuation, then my suggestion is to use more mature words, maybe with more than one sylable?
    just a suggestion!!
    Geo
    xoxoxox

  • 19 years ago

    by sami b

    a poem can never be wrong, your are doing great, just be real with your feelings and dont think too hard about what you are writing. just let it flow..

  • 19 years ago

    by !*!Zoe!*!

    I like it....but I do have to agree a little with Enslavement. It does seem a little forced. Also, the use of the "&" sign disturbs me as well as the confusion with your/you're...
    But, it still a pretty good. Just try not to be so forced and thanks for the comment.
    xoxZoexox

  • 19 years ago

    by EoB

    You told me to check you out, and so I did, and I am sorry to say that I don't like this poem at all. The rhymes seem extremely forced, and the theme is not actually original, not that it must be, but still...

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