Patchwork Ribbons

The fire inside my soul is burning out
There’s no way you know what my life’s about.
My eyes go back to that very day
Where I tried to throw my life away.
With a silver blade and a bloody crimson towel
But don’t judge me if I happen to scowl.
Every night I sit on my bed
Wondering if the next day I’ll end up dead
You may not understand everything I do
I believe that what I do is true
The things I do is to get rid of my pain
But these patchwork ribbons are all I gain
My tears of red, always fall to the floor
My pain I just cannot take anymore
I hate to cry in front of people I know
I don’t like any of my pain to show
Therefore everyday I use this blade
This is a coping mechanism that I just can’t trade
I have tried to stop because I know I should
But I really don’t think that I could
If I don’t stop, do you think that I would die
To pay for all my sins and especially all my cries
But if I do stop would I be saving my life
By once and for all giving up my knife?

~Madison Leigh~ May 17th 2005