Its all inside

I’m really not in the mood for this,
I try to force something through but its really not working.
Once again I feel like crap today,
But then what’s new/ I live in this numbing

I wanted to do it so bad today,
I needed to feel the pain once more.
I wanted to end it all today,
Go painfully and alone on the bedroom floor.

I feel like there’s nothing in this world for me,
To just be able to let would be sheer bliss.
Would the people around me even care at all?
Its not it’s me that they would miss.

Why do I even bother anymore?
Each day I suffer through
Faking smiles and the occasional laugh,
Am I the only one who knows my feelings are hanging around like the flu?

I want to be in a place where I don’t have to be a fake,
Where I can concentrate on more than putting on a happy face,
Where I’m not to blame for other people’s grief,
Please tell me this place exists so I can go and pack my case.

But I stop dreaming and come back to reality again,
I know it’s stupid to think that life could be this way,
Tomorrow the mask will come back and feelings pushed aside,
Just so I can fake my way through another day.

some help with the title would be gr8 if u can be bothered