Backwards Schadenfreude

Is it wrong
To both love and hate
Seeing you happy
Because all I want
Is for you to be happy
But I don't want
It to be because of someone else

Is it so wrong
To hate you
For having found someone
When that someone
Isn't me

But to still love you
Because that
Will never change

I guess its just
Backward schadenfredue
Instead of taking pleasure
In other people's pain
I take pain
In other people's pleasure