Too Afraid To Stay

I'm holding tight a razor
But the blade won't touch my skin
Don't want to let you down
It's just this fight is hard to win

I'm searching through the cabinets
I hope this is enough
But I just can't seem to swallow
Guess I'm trying to be tough

I'm loading dads old gun
Hold it to my head
Waiting for the moment
But I put it down instead

I'm standing on a chair
The knot is tied just right
But my feet don't leave the edge
I just can't loose this fight

I'm filling up the bathtub
Cords and cables all plugged in
But I can't seem to flip the switch
This feels like such a sin

I'm standing on a bridge
This might be the day
I'm still afraid to jump
But much more scared to stay