Ocean breeze part 2

by just a little girl   May 17, 2006


There was no where to run
he said "time to have some fun
you have got such a pretty face
do you want to come to my place"

i went to his place
he touched my face
i stayed there that night
i know its probably not right

After that we meet up everyday
we meet in the beautiful bay
we kissed we touched
we hugged we loved

he is my heart, my soul, my life
suspicion is now rife
at home i'm with someone else
now im taunting myself

he knows im already taken
but from our love we will never awaken
that what the ocean breeze does to you
it helps you find love anew

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by amoxi

    This was a very good ending but its sad that she has someone else and they cant be the couple they want to be because of that it was a great poem your a great writer keep it up

  • 17 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    I liked this part too, you are very talented. I thought the flow was a little off in some places, but apart from that, it was very good.

  • 17 years ago

    by Kalgalath

    I really like the rhyming in this one. and int part 1.

  • 17 years ago

    by Flaminia

    I like this one better,it flows better,it's omogeneous.Especially the lats verses,they sound so ....so....I guess I can't find the right word,I might say hopeful,but it's not exactly what I mean.You deserve a 5 here.

  • 17 years ago

    by not a poet

    I liked the first one but this one went by too quick! still loved it tho!

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