Deep, Buried Inside

Deep, buried inside
Are shadows where it lies
Behind my smiles and happy eyes
Is a force of chaos
It's beyond my control
And each time I call upon my curse
It only makes it worse
No way to make it better
Snared into its depths
It frightens me
The unknown power that resides within
Part of me I try to reach for
But we are one and the same
Two sides of the same coin
The same heart, same blood, same soul
But out of control
A well of untamed poison
It's the stuff pumped through my veins
My mind cannot breach its ties
It stills, exhausted and spent
I can't live off the lies I'm fed
Can't destroy this secret self
One and the same, united in pain
Can't destroy what's truly me
Can't suddenly become free
Not without hurting me
Not without killing me