Painkiller

I cant take much more of this pain in which i stay,
what should i do to make this go away?

This world of torment i cant describe,
i leave today to find a better life.

What started off as black n white,
down d road it became a blur.
make me believe that i'll be allright,
the noise of the silence has left me disturbed.

But,your tear drop,what i had with me was a suggestion,
i looked for the answer but every answer was just another question.

Death in the blade,and your lies in my head.
knife in my hand,my hand on my chest.
No-one cares,so they wont regret.
Im lying here,
bleeding,
on my bed.
Alone i break,
as i try to accept,
an alternate life that i cant seem to forget.

In love with someone,
i have never seen.
I pretend she is there,
but why does she scream?

All that i did,
i've been having this dream.
Was I not supposed to be here?
is that what it means?