Comments : Killed me With a Fantasy

  • 16 years ago

    by Princess

    I really like it 5/5 check out my stuff

  • 16 years ago

    by Ashleigh Skye

    Wow I loved this poem.. just like everyone else it reminded me of a song. Perfect, I dont typically like thoes kinds of poems but somehow all your words made it magical. I could feel all the love sadness and even a little bit of anger in this poem, but nothing was out of place or too much. Nice flow as well. I'm going to vote for this poem to participate in the weekly contest cause I think it has a shot.

  • 16 years ago

    by KaKaSHi

    Damn man!! amazing!! so full of feeling!!!!!!!! 5/5 from me....an incredibly great poem...

  • 16 years ago

    by azii

    Loved it! It was absolutely amazing. So strong and full of emotion. Loved it. My fav parts were:

    You held my hand] (You let it go)
    [You promised me](Each promise: Broke)
    [You said you loved me](Now, you don't.)
    [You said you'd hold me](Now you won't.)

    I'm losing air, it's hard to breathe;
    The water's creeping up on me.
    Each breath I take may be my last...
    (I'm going down... I'm sinking fast.)

    They were wonderful.. Great job.

    Keep it up
    && Take care! :)

  • 16 years ago

    by Leanne

    I break apart with every word.
    Divert your eyes so YOU aren't hurt.
    Don't care for me, I will be fine...
    (There goes my "Once upon a time...")

    This was my fave stanza, stuck in my head more than the others, the whole poem flowed well and the imagery was great!! Well done on this its a beautiful write 5/5

  • I love this poem...why?...because I love it when poets use metaphors to characterize the meaning of the poem... I especially liked
    *I'm sure I'm gonna sink below
    -- there's nothing I can do.
    I'm running out of oxygen...
    (It's all because of you.)
    It's the perfect ending...5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Nick who Plays Pool

    I liked the title and the first stanza was great, same to all the others. 5/5 and keep up the good work.

  • 16 years ago

    by BeautifulDisaster

    I love this poem... and i can relate to it too... the wording is great and the flow is amazing. there is sorta a rhyming scheme, but it needs a little help... but all in all 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Nicole

    5/5 such a beautiful and sad write. its an amazing piece of work.

  • 16 years ago

    by Espoirfailed

    I loved the bit in brackets and i think having no set rhyming scheme seems to help things seem more raw somehow, dunno how :P but anyway i think this was a really deep powerful poem, i wish i could write like this *grinds teeth with envy* hmmm bye now

  • 16 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    I frikken LOVED this!
    Such a great opener and from there it just kept getting better and better.
    The flow was flawless, the imagery wonderfully done and I didn't want this to end.
    You did a great job with this!

  • 16 years ago

    by redscream

    Awsome job! it is so...real-that's all i can think!

  • 16 years ago

    by debbylyn

    Really like the feel of this piece....flow is excellent...vivid imagery and nice rhyme scheme.
    I particularly like the way you did this verse....

    [You held my hand] (You let it go)
    [You promised me](Each promise: Broke)
    [You said you loved me](Now, you don't.)
    [You said you'd hold me](Now you won't.)

    well done....5/5 All the best, Debbie

  • 16 years ago

    by Sarah Ann

    Very powerful and amazing poem.

  • 16 years ago

    by The Lonely Rose

    Wow excelent poem! luved it....i mean its deep! its sad and its just makes me go..wow!! great job!

  • 16 years ago

    by Anonymous Angel

    Hey,
    awesome poem, its so deep and full of emotion, the first stanza was really good, its like stuck in my head right now..
    keep up the good work =)
    5/5
    kisses stephanie

  • 16 years ago

    by Sorefromreality

    Amazing.

    i can see it must be a song. bravo.
    the rhythm was great, and all the words were perfectly flowed together from wut i see.
    the raw emotion is there and i love the way u wrote it.

    love ya lots,
    sore

  • 16 years ago

    by cowgirlstar26

    It make a good song :) I liked it, im not a huge fan of this style but it worked.

  • 16 years ago

    by Im not broken anymore

    Wow this is excellent this is so good...... How do i nominate it?

  • 16 years ago

    by Im not broken anymore

    Wow this is excellent this is so good...... How do i nominate it?