Near You

This one is little better then your others but it is still poor. I won't rate it. I don't like it.

Consticted = constricted

love I'm dying= love that I'm dying

sometimes you make me feel like fly = sometimes it feels like I'm flying

What am I supposed to do =
What am I supposed to do?

I'd do anything can't you see =
I'd do anything; Can't you see?

we weren't meant to be = we aren't meant to be

The poem seems unfullfilled, and it leaves me empty towards the end of the poem. I enjoy it, but it was...
Let's just say the poem would be much more better with grammar, and punctuation, and some extra "Umph" put into it. I like the metaphor you used, but it just... didn't feel like enough.

However, I like your word use and your metric setup. Good job, m'dear.

5/5
~Stephen White

"But when you're near me
I realize we weren't meant to be

What a twist. I love it. good job. Nice flow, well pinned, stong emtion. 4/5

Interesting... what I liked the most about this poem would have to be the very short stanzas. In the beginning it shoulds like a girl who lost the love of her life and would give anything in the world to get it back yet in the end it sounds like she is fine with the way it turned out. I really liked the twist that doesnt happen to much in love poems.. where the person still cares about the person yet doesnt love them anymore.. Its ususally either how much they love them or that they cant stand them for breaking their hearts. wonderful twist. nice write.

Eeewww a sad twist at the end. great job

your servant:
david