Tears

That was really great! From start to finish your words really amazed me.
"The love I dream of
Slips away like sand
Through my fingers
It barely caress�s my hand"
I like the way you described love like sand slipping through your fingers. It gave alot of meaning to your poem.That body that is in so much torture
Falling tears turning into dust
No longer can I endure
Your deceitful lust.
These were the perfect ending lines for your poem! 5/5

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Lovely poem, with a nice flow and sheer grief depicted in a poetic form. I loved the flow and It really touches the heart. Your poems are really good

Tc

You give a pretty good over all view but I think if a reader was to really want to get in your thoughts I think you would have to put some exsamples in the structure of the twork just a thought Plot121

Really good poem and I liked the bit that says:
'The memories that brings
So much grief
You shattered my world
Destroyed my belief'
Good rhyming 5/5

What a very sad piece you have penned. Very heartfelt.
Good job!
Take Care Cindy