Mon Utopie (my utopia) **french**

by Corruption   Jun 23, 2007


Une vampire dans le nuit,
brille comme les etoiles,
plus sucre des plus sucre fruits,
la visage cache dans une voile.

elle est mon utopie,
les feuilles danse autour d'elle,
pour elle je peux vivre dans la poubelle,
une vampire dans la nuit.

elle est brillante, belle, ma beaute,
avec elle la lune je peux saute
la voix est musique
elle est fantastique.

** there are accents in it but i am not quite sure how to put them on the computer lol and i am not perfect in my verbe tenses so ya hope those who can read like it i got 86% on it lol**

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  • 16 years ago

    by Lizaveta

    This poem really captured me
    the atmosphere you create is very intriguing
    i love the images you use to create such atmosphere: le nuit, la lune, la visage cache dans une voile.....

    "les feuilles danse autour d'elle" <-- this is one of my fav lines

    and the vampire image is also great because it adds mistery to the whole picture.

    5/5
    and i added it to my favs

  • 16 years ago

    by Melpomene

    Honestly, quite a beautiful piece. My french is a little off seeing as I havnt spoken it in years but I loved how you described the vampire as yours and as beautiful. It truely gave it a twist. The first line was capturing I belive it went something like "my vampire in the night" it really stood out as it seemed eerie. Well done on writing such a facinating piece and trying a different langauge. ~mel

  • 16 years ago

    by Bryan

    C'est tres bon keenan, je n'ai pas su que vous parlez francais, love the wording and story behind it, i give it a perfect 5/5!!! keep them coming!!!

  • 16 years ago

    by Dying Beautifully

    I love it... It is awesome and you would have to be pretty dumb not to understand it.. no offence but yeah..

    Beck

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