CHORUS:
you left me on this broken road
and drove off in the opposite direction
left me with my shattered past
acting like there was no connection
i stop and stare at the sun in the sky
i dry my eyes and i believe
that you've left today

i realy love this style. that was such a nice song.. but most i love the chorus that stanza.. it made me realize that i should also write songs. that was awesome.

and you know one thing that you realy deserve 5/5

yeh!! takecare. 5/5

hassan kirmani

Good job

I really liked it. It starts out a little slow then it picks up the pace. The word choice is awesome and it has a nice flow to it. I gave it a 5/5. (I hope that it will take you far)

I loved the way you slightly change the chourses but kept the same idea... works really well LOVE your choice of words, personaly it gives me an amazing image of what is happening.
well done i REALLY hope this takes you far and i hope everything works out for you...

i cant think of any critisisims at the moment but if any come to mind ill be sure to let ya know!
well done again!

Love
Jacs
xxxx

I find it hard to comment on songs because the reader can't hear whats going on in the writers head, we can only read the words. I like the chorus and I feel it's very strong but I think you could definately make the verses a bit stronger. All in all I really enjoyed the read and I can't wait to hear it lol Excellent job 5/5 GG23

Omg!!!! you are such a good writer...i think this can truly be a hit if you can get publicity behind it....you really have a talent!!! i love the way you played each chorus just a little bit different from the last one....and i am sooooo sorry for you that someone made you feel this way...*smile always!!!
~barbara

Wow, i loved it, it was beautifully written, i loved the way the chorus was slightly different each time i read it, i'm sorry you feel that way though, whoever made you feel that way should think again. the only critisism i have is the verses could be stronger and yeah, thats about all, over all. i loved it, well done 5/5

Oh my god!! This is the best I've seen from you yet!!!! I didn't read the description at the top until after I read the lyrics, and thats exactly what I took from it - that you left your past (or your past left you)..its almost surreal, you give your past like...human traits, and just...fantastic!!!! I really hope they take you in, I would love to hear this on the radio someday!

It was interesting, for songs it's hard to say if there good or not, as my personal opinion it just looked like any other song out there, (for me) it had some uniqe parts that I liked but you cant really say how good a song is unless you hear the music along with the lyrics, and know the real meaning behind the lyrics,
But I can tell it has very deep meaning to it, And personal reference in it,
So i'll give you a 5/5
Keep writeing!

Andrew
Excellent job on your lyrics :) Do you sing too? Love to be able to hear this one put to music. Awesome :)
Take Care Cindy

Outstanding lyrics for the song. Very well suiting the topic and the context. It is my pleasure to rrc this piece so well written and well penned. If I can get, I would be glad to get this song when it is composed. A well deserved 5/5. God bless you for your work and love to others.

tc

Your poetry evolved to songs...A dream of many poets who wants to achieve greatness of expression....great job keep it up 5/5 vote and comment on my latest work "GIFTS OF SORROW" "ARABIAN SANDS" "MY TEARS"

THANK YOU

Hey its me. well theres only one thing i could say about this piece because i thought it was amazing you have feeling with this song as i do withalot of mine im really speachless right now no joke. they will really love it no doubt in my mind for that. luves.

Its a great song. I was trying to make my own kinda rhythm with it. It flowed greatly. What genre will this song be placed in? Well, nonetheless it was an amazing song. 5/5.

I say it sounds like it's a very good song... I loved the vocab it had and the emotion that was put into it... I would give this 5/5...

Nice song
I LLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEE
It

Great job actually excellent job, 5/5

It's a great poem/song I would like to hear it if you ever record it :) I like your choice of words, well done

you left me on this broken road
and drove off in the opposite direction
^^Those two lines is powerful.

Uhm.. why is there 3 chorus.. I'm just curious.. To be honest.. I don't know how to write songs xD

5/5! keep up the good work.

The flow and everything was great, along with your choice of words... it was very well written and I wouldn't change a thing :-) 5/5

Now this was a pleasure to read. I can definitley see this a really great song. Wonderful word choice and catchy lines. 5/5

marcella