Senses Fail

by Tammie   Nov 3, 2007


These days, I'm numb to the touch of you,
It's like you're a ghost I just pass through.
Losing right mindset when you're around,
These feelings I get makes my heart pound.

Hearing your voice, my heart skips a beat,
Singing to me, your lyrics so complete.
When I get lonely, I listen to your song,
Reminisce on the past; I know it won't be long.

I'll see you soon enough, we'll be together again,
Although seeing you brings happiness and pain.
Together forever is what we used to say,
But forever is never when you have it your way.

It's been so long I'm beginning to forget your taste,
The sweetness of your lips, the bitterness encased.
Memories like dust, blending with the scenery,
Old with the new and joy with the misery.

I miss your scent like the old summer days,
We used to spend together, just like a cliche.
Lust filled the air, wherever we would go
Hearts on our sleaves, together on show.

But now you're gone my senses fail,
Our relationship has become an old fairytale.
No touch, sound, sight, taste or scent,
All we share now is our deep lament.

[Written for a contest]

    report violation
0


Did You Like This Poem?

Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by donna

    This poem was superb... It was very sweet and very well written as always... Excellent, well done Hun x

  • 16 years ago

    by Bret Higgins

    This is a better poem than Rearview Mirror for two reasons

    Firstly it feels more structured and you stay the course. Secondly it doesn't feel over written and it is a more fluid read.

    The sweetness of your lips, the bitterness encased.

    Good line, but I would change the second 'the' to and to remove repetition, also that would remove a pause that isn't really needed (in my opinion)

    Pretty good diction, easy on the eye whilst being heartfelt and deeper than most teenage love poetry.

    Not bad at all.

    Bret

  • 16 years ago

    by The Herald

    Neato....if i was you though, id put this under sad, loss. b/c the end ties it together into a realy, meaningful sad poem. i enjoyed it, and have noticed that this one also seems to be written for a contest...what contest are u entering and were can i join?! lol, i liked it...a lot...=)

  • 16 years ago

    by Prophecies In Kodak

    Oh, i swear! i know! i believe it! OH! i can't stop hearing all the singing! OH! my soul has never had this feelingggg. it feels like so much love. you've got so much love in youuu.

    that song explains it. lmao.

  • 16 years ago

    by kelly

    Hi, love the poem, thank you for your comments, really appreciated. x

Read All Comments (5)

More Poems By Tammie