My Immortal

by NyellMoonlight   Dec 17, 2007


Addiction mesmerized soul,
darkened with velvet notes
weaved within twisted illusions,
solemnly frigid.

Delusive
flames of burnt candles
frame ritual dance, laced melodies...
... worlds are sinking in your eyes,
delusively.

Red-eyed princess cries tears of pearly regrets
over the ashes that gave birth to bloody fairytales;
breath of swan-songs arched over our towers
offering sacrifices to you, my immortal.

Destroyed are all
fragments of dreams that we kept
far from the fingertips of avid pawns...
... my days are dieing on your lips,
causing fragrant destruction.

Addiction mesmerized soul,
darkened with velvet notes
waved within twisted illusions,
solemnly frigid.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by T uh Belle lll

    You have amazing vocabulary, but the way you use it is simply beautiful.

    I like how you repeated solemnly frigid twice in the first and last stanza, and the punch line "my immortal" was flat in the middle. I thought that was a nice set up.

    I hope to read more of your well thought out poetry soon!

    -tia

  • 16 years ago

    by Natalie84

    So I'm like mesmorized with the way you write. Seriously, I'm not sure what to say - some times you read a poem and have nothing to say about it. I say this because some times I feel as though I'm not really "qualified" to give my two cents...HAHAHAHA I stuggle with poets like you becasue my poetry is so simple...I write how I talk...

    Simply amazing...I love the dark love!!!

    "Red-eyed princess cries tears of pearly regrets" I like this!!! Masjestic Darkness!!!! YES!!!! lol :)

    Nice write!!!!

  • 16 years ago

    by Mello193

    Very nice words, beautiful visions, it was great

  • 16 years ago

    by PygmyPuff

    Another amazing poem with excellent wording and brilliant descriptions.

  • 16 years ago

    by Kaila

    Wondeful vocabulary
    it was an excellent poem
    the mood was good and suttle
    I loved it
    5/5
    kaila

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