A decaying forever

Everyone says its the little
things that mean the most
so thats what i try to do for you
but don't think im just trying to boast

i am always thinking of you
not because i cant get you off my mind
but because your the only thing i want there
in my mind you will forever be entwined

whenever i walk outside
i blow a kiss into the wind
so that when it blows it will
make my kiss on your cheek pinned

to remind you of me, so the next
time the winds blowing on your face, let it be
because remember that its only
delivering my kiss to you for me

i give you those little email's,
you know, the stupid ones with
no real reason for me sending them to you
but that doesn't mean the things i write in them are myths

i always call you to wish you happy birthday
or any other holiday, because i want you to
know that i never forget about you, and
that my love for you is, in fact, very true

i have never yelled or sworn at you
even though you do when your upset
i keep a calm, sweet tone to make you feel safe
and remind you that to you i will never be a threat

even though you talk about other girls
i never tell you that i wish i was her
i just sit there and smile, telling you i hope you two are happy
but as i do, all these mixed emotions start to stir

when i hear you say "i've missed you so much"
my heart just starts to rapidly beat and then it sinks
i know im the one who caused all this pain to be
i can't seem to speak, i just sit there and blink

i just ask you "are you happy with her"
when you tell me yes my heart breaks all over again
but every time, with a fake smile i tell you "thats what matters"
but inside of my heart this pain is driving me insane

i not only hear what you say, i listen
i remember all the little comments you make
and later your surprised i know so much about you
and i hope, in some way, im proving to you that im not fake

your the only one i do all these things for
i never should have told you goodbye
feelings i have for you, ill never have for anyone else
and for my stupid decision...i will always cry</3

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