Weekly Contest Results August 5th

  • Meena Krish
    4 years ago

    Hello everyone, sorry for the delay. Thank you judges for your time and effort.
    Congrats to all the winners and all those who received a HM.

    //WINNERS//:

    Reflections (Collaboration with Daniel) by Nourayasmine (30 points)

    Brother by Matt Carroll (25 points)

    Extinction of her Recovery by Star (14 points)

    //COMMENTS//:

    Reflections (Collaboration with Daniel) by Nourayasmine (10 points)

    A collaboration that works seamlessly to create a dynamic piece of writing.
    The opening line "Women like you are lonely” Immediately raised in my
    mind the question – Doesn’t everyone deserve happiness? The first sixteen
    lines portrays loneliness in a vivid and creative way that could be describing
    anyone male or female suffering the ravages of loneliness and from then on
    is more specific. It portrays a woman who through her search for love and
    company has made a lot of bad choices leading her to be labeled….. She
    gives love and time and even a child yet still she finds love elusive. Finally,
    in her head she becomes just an object to be touched and abused at the mercy
    of others who are never there for her. It is heart breaking poem steeped in
    honest observations / reflections about a problem that happens to many
    women. I think that it also carries a message for all of us not to judge others
    badly because of where they find themselves because in a different world that
    might have been our path too.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Reflections (Collaboration with Daniel) by Nourayasmine (10 points)

    What a collaboration you two! Seem-less, couldn't tell where each of you started
    and ended. We do and have done a lot as woman, not to feel lonely. Bad choices,
    selfish lovers, uncaring children. So many things that eat at our self worth. This
    piece for me touched on all of these. If you are free and open with your love, you
    are judged. If you are pious and guarded, you are judged. It's hard to be truly yourself,
    open and exposed because then you are open to attack. There is always an opportunistic
    human looking to take advantage and use. Well done with this. It spoke volumes!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Reflections (Collaboration with Daniel) by Nourayasmine (10 points)
    “Women like you
    are lonely.”
    ^
    This here, in my opinion, it what it took the poem a “collaboration”, to another
    lever. And I had so many thoughts come up to me. Who are the women like her?
    Who is she? Or is it all women? Why is/are she/they lonely?

    She then is describing the loneliness she is feeling, and he is signifying and
    proving it.

    “You give birth,
    you give love,
    you give time,”
    ^
    And here it appeared to me, it is leaning more towards all women including her.

    The ending is bitter, and left me distressed. But here it is recognized and feels like
    being consoled. Yes woman are vulnerable, but I believe that is the beauty we hold.
    Even though in so many cases it is taken as an advantage when it shouldn’t.

    Each and every word are thoroughly thought of, and the balance between Daniel
    and Noura is so smooth. A masterpiece indeed.
    --------------------------------------------
    Brother by Matt Carroll (7 points)

    I was drawn to this poem because of the strong message of hope and support
    that one person offers another when the first is going through a really tough
    time. I think most people at some time or another have felt themselves in as
    situation where everything seems to be going wrong some worse than others
    and having support in such dark times is priceless. This poem feels like a
    soothing hug and a lightening of a load shared. Almost conversational with
    each stanza representing the sufferer and the friend with the strong message
    “You are not alone” Maybe a message we should all take on board to hold out
    a hand of friendship and support when we see someone else in need.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Brother by Matt Caroll (7 points)

    So many of us feel alone. We wonder why we bother to keep going each day. I
    think in this day of instant gratification and lighting speed notification we are
    more alone than ever before. Sounds like an oxymoron doesn't it? Matt brings
    home how so many of us feel and he also brings home the comforting message
    that we are never truly alone. Someone has heard you and people appear in your
    life at the strangest times. To lend a hand, to lend an ear. You are never alone.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Brother by Matt Carroll (4 points)

    There is a mix of sadness and encouragement in the poem. Family is one of the
    most important aspects of life, and having it by our side in our darkest times is a
    blessing. For me personally, this is more inspirational than sad. The poem is written
    beautifully as a conversation or a potential one, and it flows really well. I really
    loved this!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Brother by Matt Carroll (7 points)

    This poem touched me in many ways; to read and feel the support which
    every one of us want from our siblings. Knowing you have that one person in the
    family who will be there no matter what and will support and stand by you through
    thick and thin. Reading this made my heart teary…nicely penned.
    ----------------------------------------------------
    Extinction of her Recovery by Star 4 points

    This piece reminded me of a person being in a toxic relationship. With every
    abusive act her partner has taken a piece of her, killing her slowly, killing the
    person she was. Even if she has hurt her partner in some way she's always the
    tender of wounds, the person who makes it all better. She thinks this was the last
    time, it's always the last time, until the next time. So she stays, each time losing
    more of herself until one day there is nothing left to give, nothing left of her and
    this beautiful engaging woman is truly extinct.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Extinction of Her Recovery by Star (10 points)

    I adored this poem, quite simply. The metaphor for this woman ‘fixing’ this other
    person and killing herself in the process is an extremely dark, but intelligent image.
    I wasn’t aware that silkworms die when they weave the silk, so this made the read
    even more uncomfortable and moving. There’s an abundance of excellent word
    choice too. Words such as ‘grazed’, ‘punctured’, ‘extracted’ are all so clinical and
    obtuse. This poem stands up on a pedestal this week for me. A deserved winner.

    //HM’s//:

    No Title by Matt Carroll (4 points)

    Third Degree by Aegis (10 points)

    Fatalist by Aegis (4 points)

    Untitled by Mark (4 points)

    Perhaps by Darren (7 points)

    Little Billy and, his Time Machine by CRAFTY KEN (7 points)

    //COMMENTS//:

    Untitled by Mark (4 points)

    My initial thought at not seeing a title was that Mark had forgotten to give it one
    but then after reading the poem I realized that in all likelihood it was a conscious
    act that reinforced the tone and message of the poem. Throughout he shows the
    suffering felt by many poets when trying to put to paper the emotions and feelings
    that affect them deeply. He compares black ink to being like the blood red of pain
    and that when words are placed upon the paper, rich with emotion, that it
    transforms the paper and becomes as if soaked in blood. “The page being likened
    to a Poets scream follows on nicely with the imagery of blood and pain and then
    finally depicts the poet digging deeper inside himself for even more emotion –
    exhuming scars for art and words. For me a truly visual and emotion depiction of
    the worst kind of poetic struggle.
    ----------------------------------------------
    Little Billy and, his Time Machine by CRAFTY KEN (7 points)

    I am not a child yet the poem drew a smile on my face. It has a lovely rhythm,
    and is different in a really good way. I was hooked from beginning to end. It feels
    like a poem written from a father for his children. It just needs illustrations and it
    would make a lovely children book.
    ---------------------------------------------
    No Title by Matt Carroll (4 points)

    I really like this inspirational message. With just few lines the positive
    voice of the writer lifts the reader’s heart which assures that even in the
    darkest of moments do not give up and march on and you will acquire its
    rewards. I can see this as an inspirational card. Well done!
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Third Degree by Aegis (10 points)

    I can’t put it in words but this short write has such a vivid image which
    portrays the contrast of fire and destruction with two point of views. So few
    words are used here yet it carries the image very strongly..another excellent
    write.
    ----------------------------------------------------
    Fatalist by Aegis (4 points)
    Aegis’s poems are unique in that they usually say a lot in so few words. His poems
    often beckon to be reread, as they are often snapshots; bite sized glimpses at a bigger
    picture. I enjoyed how this poem has a narrator who doesn’t fit in, a poet who writes
    poetry because he/she has to. An outsider. How many poets are outsiders though? Or
    at least feel that way? How many of us can relate to this feeling? How many of us feel
    that our writing exists only because we know it should? I feel this poem perfectly
    captures the unease behind being a writer and is deserving of 4 points at least.
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Perhaps by Darren (7 points)

    I find the self-awareness in this poem very commendable and its dry humor
    and wit a welcome change. Darren is a very underrated writer, and his poetry often
    escapes under the radar. It is another poem that questions poetry itself, moreover, the
    self-depreciation/jibes at other poetry forms proves the writer does not take himself so
    seriously. It is frustrating being a writer sometimes, even been a reader; this poem
    makes a little fun out of it. A very refreshing read indeed. ‘oh I do hate a good sonnet’.
    Is a great line.

  • Everlasting
    4 years ago

    Darren

    “oh I do hate a good sonnet’.

    I don’t think I have made you feel that awful feeling of hate but come to think about it, you are the person I have written the most sonnets to.

    I do hope to see more sonnets and in general more poems from you. :P

    By the way, congratulations winners.

  • Aegis
    4 years ago

    Thank you so much to all judges and/or volunteers this week! And a big shout out to all winners and HM's, really awesome effort this week. I think I added a good 4 or 5 authors and poems to my favorites list just this past week alone^_^

  • D.
    4 years ago

    Thanks judges for your time and effort, and for the lovely comments. Noura was the brains behind it. :)

    Congratulations to Star and Matt for 2 great poems too!

  • Star
    4 years ago

    I was really surprised to see my poem on the front page, thank you for the nomination MA and judges for your votes and comments :)

    Congratulations to the other three winners, and all HMs!!!
    Thank you Meena for your time ^_^

  • Darren
    4 years ago

    Thanks judges and congrats winners

    Luce thanks for the nomination and no you didn't Stoke the fire.

  • Milly Hayward
    4 years ago

    Congratulations to all the winners and HMs, to the judges for judging and to Meena for organising this weeks competition. Best wishes Milly x

  • Brenda
    4 years ago

    Congratulations to all the front page winners and HM's! What a diverse group! Meena, thank you for hosting and our judges for judging...have a great week everyone!

  • prasanna
    4 years ago

    Thank you Meena for hosting!

    Congrats to all those who won and picked up a HM! A lot of solid pieces all around :)

  • Larry Chamberlin
    4 years ago

    Congratulations to the front page winners and the honorably mentioned.
    Thanks Meena and thanks judges!

  • Ben Pickard
    4 years ago

    Well done, one and all. Noura and Daniel - a masterful piece of writing from you two.

  • nouriguess
    4 years ago, updated 4 years ago

    Thank you for the comments, judges, and all the members who commented on our poem. I'm very lucky that an awesome poet like Daniel collaborated with me.