The Flower

by Mortal Utopia   Jun 14, 2017


You held each raindrop,
with its shy, flickering shine,
in your outstretched petals,

and you shone with them
with your glittering, petal-wings,
like an angel -

until
you were washed away.

3


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Latest Comments

  • 5 months ago

    by Thomas

    Judging comment:

    "“You held each raindrop,
    with its shy, flickering shine,
    in your outstretched petals,”

    From this opening, I had to note that the description of a raindrop as “shy” was quite a unique observation, for it is not an adjective I’ve seen used before to describe rain. It does work well though, in this space, and in a way, adds to a personifying motif in the first stanza, by which the flower seems almost humanlike - outstretched, catching the rain as it falls, the rain falling shy, flickering.

    The second stanza continues the personification motif in comparing the flower’s petals to wings, and the flower itself to an angelic figure. Through the first two stanzas the poet has painted a beautiful image of this flower slicked in rainwater - akin to the red wheelbarrow of William Carlos Williams’s famous poem.

    An excellent piece with superb imagery. Well done."

  • 5 months ago

    by Ren

    Simply amazing!! Love this!

  • 6 months ago

    by Em

    Omg... To grow up with someone elses love for it to be washed away never to return is a truthful yet harsh reality as when this happens all trust is broken and it takes a lifetime to build trust and one silly moment/thing to destroy it!! :/

    Em

  • 6 months ago

    by gopi nath

    awsome

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