"I talked to her while she was in my womb-
Twenty-seven years ago.... I didn't know she
would become friends with demons... I should've
warned her about monsters under her bed...
but I didn't know they existed until now...."
Ohhhh myyy goodness. I am in tears...and just absolutely covered in chills. Those last few lines. My heart!! So much love to you, Dear Andrea. I am so sorry...
3 months ago
This is such a sad story that was very brave to write, but it seems to me you had no other way to let this out.
First of all i liked the title. It definitely can go either way for people but it works well. Because it says the age of the person you are talking about, so we get a concept of imagery as the reader. Age wise that is.
In the first stanza, you give the reader an idea of who this person is. The girl you birthed, your daughter of course. You are remembering pain.
And because the pain your daughter is going through, she wants you to wnd her suffering but as her mother you simple can't.
You don't want to see her fall into addiction. Or that is what i assume to be the case. I liked the ending very much so. Because we all have demons.
The poem as a whole is a wonderful yet sad read, because of the story you tell. You as the mother is descending into madness and as the reader i can feel that. You let the reader feel what you are feeling. I believe the strongest part of the poem to me is the wording. You used wording to create the atmosphere of the poem and it works because you have all the negative emotions inside of the poem. You set the tone well.