One Shot.

by Jessica   Aug 28, 2007


Thrust backwards by the force of hate,
Relinquishing power over twisted limbs,
Sweat and blood soaking into salty wounds,
Fury etched into a face, fading as the light dims.

Sharp intakes of breath; ruby streams released.
Pain trickles, final beats echo, a soul left to rot.
Lifeless eyes mirror shock; color gradually drained,
Adoration shattered; you killed me in one shot.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by HOLLYWOODxBANGBANG

    I liked it, but I felt like the lines could have had a little more description in them to help the reader full see what is going on. The imagery was great and did help me, but a little more description would make it better so that the end isn`t just thrown in there and so sudden.

    But, the imagery, wording and flow were all very good.

    5.5
    :]

  • 16 years ago

    by chris

    I loved the end, the beggining didn't make much sense to me at first til I got there but overall you created a very fine piece! keep up the good work 4/5

  • 16 years ago

    by XLOSTxxANDxxWANDERINGX

    Hey i really love this poem
    wery , very deep
    i would not call this this sweet but its very poewerful

  • 16 years ago

    by Michelle18

    WOW...this was very intense.. the violence and anger made me focus on the poem completely..

    great flow and just a wonderful job on this one.5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Brittney

    This poem is amazing! The detail and imagery in it is outstanding. Almost like the reader(me) were there watching the whole thing, if that makes any sense to you. Either way this is a very powerful poem. Keep up the good work.
    5/5
    *Brittney