Left With Doubt {Trois-par Huit}

by BREEawNUHH   Oct 6, 2008


--FIRST attempt at this form. Be nice. :P

My false hope
dies as I climb the rope
I fall down just as I reach the top

I tell myself to give it all up and please stop
Losing it all as I shed a tiny teardrop

Everything inside has leaked out
It's all gone, a knockout
Left with doubt

Briana Coulter
October 6th, 2008

The Trois-par Huit has three stanzas of 3, 3, 2 or 3, 2, 3, which you can decide for yourself. There is a strict syllable count of, 3, 6, 9, 12, 12, 9, 6, 3 and a rhyming scheme of AAB BBC CC. The last line of the poem should be the title of your piece.

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    This is a really interesting form, it seems almost so difficult, there's a syllable count AND a rhyme scheme. But, it's always good to see a poet trying different forms.. it just means you are improving! Great work. I didn't see anything with this that I would have changed. I thought the first few stanzas really brought a lot of imagery into my mind, whether it was intended or not. I think you did a good job, if you do a few more with this form you will be an expert I'm sure. Good job! (; 5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by Melpomene

    Another interesting style. I don't believe i've wrote one of these before so it was lovely to learn something new.

    In my opinion, Love poetry is the hardest to write. Simply because you can not define love. It is something that is just there. So i'm torn on this piece. I'm pretty tough at commenting love poetry but I know this is your first attempt at one of these pieces so i'll try and be a bit easier.

    The meaning behind this piece, I did like. It was honest and truthful and i'm sure many people can relate to it as love does take you up and down. Sometimes you fall, sometimes you make it. So therefor you explained how love can be a rollercoaster within the heart and mind.

    The title you used within the last line ect was great. They both worked together nicely to capture the readers attention. Good work with that.

    The only things that I thought could of been a little more interesting was you're word choice. It seemed too simple for me. But that is just my opinion, Each person has their own. So it might be just me. I know with a syllable count like that it is hard to create better description and also better words to rhyme but it just didn't capture my attention in that way. It would be hard to change this piece so I do understand where you are coming from.

    Overall I liked the meaning. This piece was good but it wasn't excellent in my opinion. 4/5 well done for trying none the less.
    -Mel

  • 15 years ago

    by Roxy

    Wow, I really need to learn poem techniques :P I've never heard of this one before. It's really good for your first try although I wouldn't know seeing as I don't really know this type of poem Haha . I liked the second stanza the most because it told a lot of meaning and I also like the words you use to rhyme like stop and teardrop >> I would have honestly never have thought that up mine would have been something like stop and drop :P that's how good I am haha.
    Amazing poem xxxx keep it up
    mwah xxx xRoxy

  • 15 years ago

    by kelleyana

    This poem draw my attention, i like the way she combine french and english to make a game. I will surely write a poem titled left with doubt. Really great poem, you go girl...

  • 15 years ago

    by your love is mine

    This poem is really good. ad the message that you give out is really good.=)