Dead Brother's Replacement

by The Angel of Secrets   Oct 18, 2008


Made to be born, you were supposed to be here,
To feel your hope and face your fear.
Created by my own parents, before I was born,
But from your little body, away life was torn.

You should have been the one traveling all around,
Having your little feet planted firmly on the ground.
You were supposed to be here before I came,
But you never even got the chance to be provided with a name.

After my sister, you should have been,
With a great and loving heart under your skin.
You would have been a boy, I don't know, but I do,
Because I was just the replacement after you.

You were supposed to grow up instead of me,
You were their child, I wasn't supposed to be.
But away your were torn, and I came instead,
With a broken heart and messed up head.

They miss you, brother, I know you cross their mind,
Everytime I get in trouble, everytime I'm unkind.
They look at me, and they see what should have been your face,
Because you were my fathers son, and I took your place.

Never did they say it, but me, I always knew,
When they look at me, what they see is you.
You are what they want, and what they really need,
You to love, you to kiss, you to hug and feed.

Conceived in a moment of true love and passion,
When you were created, the world showed no compassion.
You are now a sad line on our mothers face,
But on the paper; you're just another abortion case.

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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by NaomiNeglected

    Thats so sad.
    But dnt feel like a Replacement.
    They love you all the same I bet.
    Although it might feel like they don't I'm sure you do.
    You write from the heart and thats amazing.
    Keep up the great work, but don't let words bring you down.

  • 15 years ago

    by Alex

    This is by far the most deep and inspiring poem i have ever read

    great job

  • 15 years ago

    by HaileyHelen

    Ouch....

    I really can't even describe what this poem made me feel... I really understand it though... more than you would think. It pains me, even though I don't know you personally, to hear this agony. I'm lost for words... I'm so sorry=[

  • 15 years ago

    by ALEX

    Really a heartbreak in a bottle right there.

    First time in a long long while I've read a poem with so much real emotion in it. It's not easy feeling like someone's second option.

    I'm glad you wrote this.

  • 15 years ago

    by ether

    "But you never even got the chance to be provided with a name."
    You never had the chance to be given a name.

    Taking out some of the filler words helps this line.

    Again, the rhyme is a little basic and I think the poem goes on a bit too long (coming from me, right? ha) with the same ideas repeated. If you threw something fresh into the piece it would have been okay.
    Perhaps if you combined two stanzas together in this it would work a little better.

    This story is good- it's quite an original view on an abortion case.
    I also like how you didn't make the poem too innocent, because what child knows about abortion? None. (or perhaps a few, by child I mean less than 10).

    But the ending, I don't understand. Why would the mother be sad if she aborted the baby? Did she not want it? It's a little openended. Unless it was a miscarriage?

    The last line is good, though. It ties the whole emotion of the poem together quite bluntly, which I like.

    I'm still going to give this a five because you did a pretty good job on telling this story.

    jess ~

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