Dear Daddy,

I can't stand this anymore
It's hacking at my soul
What am I supposed to do?
I ask for advice
And all I get are these
Not so "simple solutions"
At least people attempted to help
But you
This man of influence in my life
That I can't help but allow
To impact
You're a part of me
Whether I like it or not
I can't help but love you
Even if you constantly kill my spirit
You tear me apart inside
Always ripping at my dreams
My ambitions
Ambitions to move forward
To make something of myself
Only approving
If it's a deed
You would do too
I look to the future
I plan my future
And I worry
About what our world is becoming
I also have this love for life
Yet you say I am wrong
Wrong in seeing
The beauty
In everyday
In every person
Accepting others for who they are
Human beings
Just like yourself
With hearts
And feelings
And opinions
Yet you look at them
With differences in mind
Judging and contradicting
Saying all speak falsities
If they do not comply
With your own beliefs
Beliefs that you act upon
That you put on a face for
A mask of deception
You care about nothing more
But appearance
Making a "perfect" picture
To the untrained eye
You seem like an angel
However I know better
I see the fraud
The charade
But do others?
No, I assume not
They look upon you
As an example
But searching deeper
All that can be seen is
Bitter
Repulsive
Mind tormenting
Just like you always have
Since my childhood
Playing these sick games
Just to get your way
Do you realize it?
What you do?
No
You are oblivious!
Of these devious things
Zero comprehension
Of the pain
That you inflict upon myself and others
I am NEVER going to be good enough
But come to think of it
I don't want to be
To be good enough
In your eyes
Would be the destruction
Of my inner being
And everything that I stand for
That I dance for
That I love for
That I express myself for
That I live for
I have my views
My standards and beliefs
I will defend those
With all that I am
Respect my opinions
And I will respect yours
Or feel free to fight
But it won't change a thing
I am sick of you
Your games
Your attitude
Your racial comments
And your manipulations
So hear this
I am who I am
And your opinion
Means nothing to me

*Just going off on my soapbox about my biological father.
I understand it is messy and long, but that is how it's meant to be. If you read it like you are just going off, then it will sound better. Ha ha Just a little FYI if it sounds strange.