You are a great gifted poet Jacey,
this piece is absolutely amazing, i love everything about it, everything, from the very 1st line to the very last one.
with it's affection, emotions, passion, words. flow, it's a perfect piece, which am adding to my favorites :

within my loneliest hours
my greatest weakness,

my defeat.

^^
pull my defeat up, it's not making an impact, as i guess you want, it would sound more surprising if it was not set alone that way.

You snare my heart,
and like thunder
of a retreating storm,
^^
thoughtful, amazingly said,
what a great comparison..

for you are all I wish to ever

dream of.

^^
nice ending :) effective here, good spacing..I love
the piece
a lot
5/5

This was beautifully described with a lot of passion. I could feel it in your words. It's very well structured and laid out. I like the words you used and the imaginary. Brilliant.

Danika
-xx-

A dreamcatcher..as a matter of fact I have one. A few months ago it fell down, because the wire broke in two and all of a sudden I started having nightmares again( the reason why I bought one) Duddenly it dawned on me that the dreamcatcher was no longer hanging there, so I made a new wire and..guess what? The nightmares came to an end.

I like how you wrote this down and I know what made you do it. I have these feelings too for someone and you just know they will never go away...I could almost see you staring at the night sky through the dreamcatcher, as I have done so many times.

Beautiful work, Temps:)

5/5 Ingrid

Temps,

I liked this but I also liked the other version I read in pm, I can't decide which of the two I like better. This is better written technically, but the other seemed to hold more emotion when reading. I guess i'm torn. As for the poem itself and the concept I adored it, it was bittersweet.

Nice little use of alliteration within 'web, worn' it kept rolling off my tongue as I got futher into the poem because it was again found with 'wish' and 'wasps'

The only thing I could suggest is the fact you used wish twice within the poem, it isn't a problem but we already got the understanding of the connection between wishes and your lover in the first stanza, I felt it wasn't need to reinforce the idea, even though I love the ending.

Overall a lovely poem as usual.

-Mel.

Now,this is I would say elegant! Omg I adore dreamcatchers...
I must say,your wording was creative....the pauses were perfect...and the ending..its kinda melancholic...you know :p ...

You're a loose web, worn,
fastened to the curved moon;
yet I still wish
upon you
within my loneliest hours
my greatest weakness,

This is my favorite,because its so captivating....its a lovely opening ..those you often find...that make you keep on reading!
Nice job :')

I loved the whispers in this, the beautiful summer wind that drifts in and manages to murmur so passionately. Truly you words touched me- and I love to read a moving love poem, your structure was neat too, like how you arranged separation to emphasize points and thoughts of importance. Beautiful, striking, I just love your portrayals here, they bring something new each time. A title worth capturing.

Thank you for your sweet comments and continuous support, it made my week, been a tiresome one!
Love,
MaryAnne

This is a beautiful poem to read. It has lots
of passion and emotion to it...it was from the bottom of your heart which made this poem have a voice! A lovely read :)

Another amazing write!! I love the title, I don't think I've ever heard of a love interest descrined like this. Definitely original and unique.
Take care