Relent

Goodness, I knew I wrote bad sad poems but after seeing this I think I should quit altogether! XD I could feel the emotions in this poem pouring out and I love how I could relate to them and also the simplicty you use to connect with your readers is unique. I loved this poem because I really felt like I could be this twig and I know how it feels to be walked on every day and not to be seen or cared about. Very touching.

I fall beneath your feet like an immature twig,
as you walk over my pride expecting
treasures at the chief branch.
^^^
Me loves this part!!!!! Its soo sad that many people overlook the smaller things in life because they see the larger things that seem more valuable and important when in fact without the small things the bigger things wouldn't exsist.

(puzzled) I take a deep breath and dip my face
into ashen paint,
perhaps white gives you an idea about
my surrender, and a sign of my loss.
^^^
The ultimate sign of giving up and you paint it soo well with your words. The imagery is once again overpowering and it plays this scene in our head of one army surrendering to another one and showing their defeat and lost. Wonderful parrelism.

In all, this was a wonderful poem from beginning to end and I was lost in the emotions of this piece and I am taken away with how much your writing has improved in depth and color(imagery). I hope you continue to move forward in your talent of writing. Great job and keep writing!

'I'm fading into a color that holds no symbol,'
^Loved this! A perfect way to describe that you feel you are nothing and mean nothing. Perhaps in general or to someone else.

'I fall beneath your feet like an immature twig,
as you walk over my pride expecting
treasures at the chief branch.'
^There is so much power in your words. Sometimes we fall without knowing that someone is about to hurt us because we're just too naive & get too wrapped up in the moment. The other person the does tend to walk over us and take advantage of who we are because of this. So heartbreaking, but really I adored the way you expressed yourself.

'I plead for your compassion to grant
me a lift off the burning argument,'
^Lovely! Wishing for someones love, I feel like here 'burning argument' has a double meaning. You could literally mean it, or perhaps it is the naiveness in you.

Just a perfect ending. Really adored this piece, I did the notice the ending was a part of the poem you wrote before and now you're reposting. Love love love. I felt like I could really connect to this.