My Dark Inner Pain

She told her daughter she hated her,
And wished she was never born,
She didn't even seem to care,
That her childs heart was torn.
She blamed me for all of her heartache & pain,
Did she even realize emotional abuse,
Can drive me insane?
She said I was the reason,
She never achieved her dreams.
Those words hurt me more,
Than to her they may have seemed.
All I ever wanted,
Was her love & affection.
But all I ever got,
Was my mothers constant rejection.
Feeling like a lost child,
With no one to love,
I prayed to be taken,
Away to the heavens above.
Not knowing why,
I was never good enough,
Why when I needed gentleness,
I was treated so rough.
Wondering why my existence,
Caused my mother pain,
Longing for my mothers love,
Id probably never gain,
Wanting my mom to tell me,
I was a blessing.
That I wasn't the reason,
For my mother's drug obsession.