Missing half

Who on earth am I to say,
the things I think are gold.
I look with scorn, at you each day.
mayhap my heart is cold.

So underneath this marble skin
I sit alone and stare,
the secrets that are held within
I hope To keep them there.

So who on earth am I to say,
whilst judging all of others,
some of them were made this way
with contempt for their brothers.

I look, I feel, I say to you.
Once more unto the breach
and though we sense the subterfuge.
to you, I doth not preach.

So who on earth, am I to say
that Naught could come of nothing.
People will walk by this day,
I see them from this coffin.

I push away the one I love,
And cast her to the flame.
I treat her heart like it is but,
a chess-piece in a game.

And so it came, the day she left,
it didn't seem so bad.
Until I looked, at times gone by,
And realized what I had.

I look, I feel, I hate myself
and don my faceless mask
I sit and wait with bated breath
then set forth to my task.

The nights were mine, the days were yours
And with them my heart too,
Lest I had not strength to say,
yes, I love you too.

So where am I, I dare not say.
The thought of this is black.
For you, I cry, I kneel, I pray,
But never get you back.

So now I live in my last home,
a hole dug in the soil.
A restful bed, but all alone,
A place to end the toil.

The nightmare creeps, the reaper calls
white stones upon a field.
And without you, beside me here,
My heart,
it cannot feel.