Not A Poem, But From A Shattered Heart

What hurts me is knowing we're really over and there's no way to regain what was stuck away.

What hurts the most is losing you because what we felt months ago had left yourside, but refuses to leave mine.

What hurts the most is bleeding from you conscently, my soul feels numb and I still want you forever, but you've left my embrace, how can I finish the never ending race of life without you.

What hurts the most is the biggest nightmare was losing you and it came true. It still doesn't feel like reality for us to be over, more then it felt like a dream to know you cared about me too, but that didn't last as long as we both excepted or wanted.

What hurts the most is it doesn't feel real to be without you loving me in return. It doesn't feel right to no longer be dating you.

What hurts the most is I threw myself at you because I thought you loved me too when really you were fading all along. And now I have to meet you were we've been meeting since we first became friends way back in September and not put my hand out to you when we come beside me and not asking for a hug when I just want you to hold me but I know you're more respectful and old fashion then that. When i feel like cuddling up to you I no longer have a choice, when I just want to hear your voice, I can't call you, when I want to tell you I love you, or tell you I miss you, I can't breath with the truth that I can't. There is so many things that I wish I could do, but I can't. So many things I use to do, but now I can't. And so many wishes for us to come true, that now won't. So many things that I wanted us to try, that never will never be lived out, because YOU DON'T WANT ME.

What hurts an unbelievable amount is I threw myself at you because I loved you, I wanted you to never forget it and I loved the warmth of the feeling of your body next to me, your side touching my side. I remember when you slide your fingers up and down my spine, I remember when you tickled my sides. I can recall so heavily when you wrapped your arms around me in those basketball games at the end of gym class. You didn't care how sweaty I was, yu just wanted to beat me, and as sweaty as I was afterwards you still held my hand, and hugged me goodbye, told me you loved me back.

What hurts so incredible is I threw myself at you, trying to cuddle with you that best way I could without the other person trying to cuddle back and I guessed you were leaving me in close time when you backed away from everything us dating had been and didn't try to get next to me anymore and never said wouldn't come when I brought them up, like our first kiss and cuddling together. I'D PAY ANYTHING, JUST COME BACK, I LOVE YOU, LOVE ME TOO, IT'D BE TRUE!

I tried so hard to get next to you when I was your girlfriend, I was hoping that would never change. I tired so hard to get close to you when we were boyfriend and girlfriend, I wanted you to crave me like I was craving you. I wanted you to kiss me like my eyes were telling you. I wanted you to never want to leave my side, but that came and left.

I threw myself at you, but in the end you pushed me away for good, and I feel like I'll die from all this pain.

It doesn't seem right to at goodbyes during our freedom I can't ask for a hug any longer and you can't open your arms up to me.

YOU DON'T LOVE ME, YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT ME ANYMORE, AND YOU DIDN'T FEEL IT!!!