Seeking

My thoughts revolve around all the things,
that my mind cannot grasp and perhaps
I will feel dizzy, but I should probably stop
to focus on the middle, since a circle
does not have beginning and end anyway.

Maybe it's exactly that, it might be enough
of an explanation if we do not understand.

But actually that doesn't matter because
I can't identify myself or use the circle
to come out of my shell and find my way
back in when I feel ready for it.

Actually I should be in Rome by now,
even with my disorientation, my will
should have been strong enough.
And actually I should not stumble upon
my own feet because they are hot
on my heels, pushing me forward.

That is a bit too much I and yet
it does not suffice.

Actually I need something from
my friends to find myself and should
not only look around me, to see
what is going wrong, but rather in me.
And actually I should stiff a stick
up my butt to stand straight and
look ahead. Invent little pills, that
increase self-confidence.

That is a bit too much I and yet
it does not suffice

because even if hope dies last,
there is nothing that makes up
for what it has to go through
and watch during that time.

But then there was you
and you said, that I am only
an human too and that tea tastes
like nothing with a bit of comfort.