Your Demon

I like it. There's an almost sarcastic and bitter feel to it. Kinda hoped it was longer though. Anyways it was great. Cheers :D

Thank u;) and thank u for the votes:D and my high rating

Strage,dark and sad...:(
Well written!Good job!!!

Steven

It is a relatable piece. There are times when we just feel like we're causing nothing but pain to our loved ones, and you penned that nicely here.
My only criticism perhaps, is the lack of punctuation, which made some parts nonsensical.
"Kill me(,) make this pain go away(.) but no
matter what
I do(,) it looks like it's here to stay"
"To you(,) I am nothing but the demon that
consumes
Your soul(. or ;) making your life a dark, empty
hole."
I do like the rhymes and the 'unfreeing', though it was meant to rhyme with the previous word, worked for me. I like it. It has this different kind of vibe to it, that I can't explain haha.
Great job. Keep writing 5
-X

Great poem. I could really relate on how I feel most of the times.
I like the feel of it.
-Shadow