Seraphina [The Stigma Of Your Eyes]

by The Queen   Jul 29, 2013


She came to me

like an apparition; white hot, clad in a wreath of lilies
and a girdle of pearls around her waist

a dream keeper that: meanders
among innumerable trees and valleys; straddles
between mountains and shabby railroads
as falling flakes of Jupiter's moon

shimmer,
then float,

like a sprinkle of fireflies around her head.

With a mother-like godform, all curves and softness
do not be misled. Her stare,
hold powerful storms
and manipulating fire

the devil's rock would crumble
the devil's hole would collapse

she is a replica of an enchantress
whose rage, fiercer than death
whose resentment, greater
than the deadliest poison

do not fall asleep,
for she is the nightmare that stalks
your every slumber
your every dream.

Baby Rainbow Prompt Challenge:

Prompts:

The stigma of your eyes
dream keeper
the devil's rock
falling flakes
white hot

Copyright (C) 2013 by EvanescentMoon.
29.07.13

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Latest Comments

  • 12 years ago

    by Saerelune

    Hahaha, oh Britt... =p Totally agree.

    I love how the enchantress is such a re-occuring theme in your poetry, yet each time she becomes deadlier and deadlier!

    This reminds me of our old RTVW-kinda-style poetry, much more abstract, but I find it very effective in fantasy/dark writes such as these. It doesn't matter if the reader doesn't quite grasp the meaning of each individual image, because the main message is clear (this woman will be your death). What matters with this kind of poetry is keeping the tension and tone up, which you did!

    I also love the way your character entered. I bet that if it was a play, all spotlights would be aimed on her. Perhaps because of her beauty, her scary beauty.

  • 12 years ago

    by Britt

    I have to admit, this poem totally freaks me out. You did such an amazing job with these prompts and turned it into an absolutely hauntingly chilling tale. It's been hard for me to read it, I usually have quit halfway through (or read real fast) because it scared me.. lmao.

    Your vocab choices in this poem are my favorite part, paired with how descriptive you are. The first three stanzas/couplets/chunks of this poem are what made it for me - the descriptions, the intensity, setting the scene. It was all just.. perfect. The way you incorporated those prompts were really brilliant. Saffies challenge is really bringing out some amazing things from you!

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