The Presence...

Wow, I don't think I have ever read a dark poem from you, not that I can remember anyway.

Your wording here was really powerful, really descriptive and eerie which fits in with the whole theme of the poem. The pace is really fast also which makes sense given that he is moving fast in his actions also.

My only suggestion would be the punctuation again, I would just add in some commas to break it up more for the reader so they know where you intended the pause to be.

I see the comment below about JTR, but I did not get this as my thought when I read it myself, I got a victim being stalked by an abuser/killer, and a real sense of their fear and panic while the criminal had a real sense of power and control, a need to cause this pain and terror on people.

Very chilling work. I love the title, it can really be put into anything, it could even be portrayed as a metaphor for the presence of an illness, or mental health illness such as depression, paranoia etc and how someone feels it is controlling them and putting false beliefs inside their head.

Anyway, nice work.

Very chilling take on Jack the Ripper.
By abstracting him you make him more fearsome: "The Presence."
In a sense you are being true to history, since the debate continues as to his true identity, and thus his appearance, personality, motivation and method of selection of his victims must all be surmised from the gruesome nature of his "work."