Help me; Let me go.

I was walking through the mountains
a refreshing solitary hike,
when out of the ambient wilderness
there was a subtle human cry.
The sound was soul wrenching but faint,
demanding to be heard, demanding to be felt.
I followed it, increasing my pace
to the fastest sprint,
my short legs could muster.
the cry was full of agony,
Almost inhumanly so.
I found her then, hanging by a rope,
Half a repelling harness.
Why would she do something so dangerous alone?

I called down to her,
"Hello, I'm a friend!"
And she looked up, eyes
full of fear, full of hope.
"Help me!" she cried,
as if she threw her whole body into my arms
finding the hero to save her at last.
And in that moment I knew I loved her
I had to save this woman I loved,
though I am no savior,
And she has her own part to do in the saving.
I cannot do the saving alone.

Without weighing success or failure
I knelt by the edge and took hold of the rope,
pulling her up to safety.
I screamed at the effort,
My arms protesting against the strain.
briefly I wondered if I was strong enough,
but I pushed the idea away,
There was no option -
I needed to be this strong, and I would be.

As I pulled her up,
inch by inch,
I knew,
I know not why,
that coming back up
was the only way she would survive.
Going down the rest of the cliff,
even with all the help in the world,
and I would lose her.
The world would lose her.
No, she had to come back up to safety.

The rope bit into my hands,
and I flinched at the pain
as I pulled her another inch
towards me.
She was close enough to see my pain,
and must have thought I would leave her then,
because in increased fervor she cried,
"Help me!"
"I am, I will" I choked back,
sweat dripping into my mouth.

But when I looked into her eyes for strength,
I saw she has already turned away
facing her gaze to the ground below her.
with a sense of foreboding
I saw in her the longing for the fall.
"Hey" I called, my voice hoarse,
"Don't let go."

She looked back up at me this time,
no words needing to be said.
This time her eyes pleaded up to me,
'Please. . . let me go'.
And then I understood,
why she had been alone when I found her -
She wanted to fall.
She wanted to end.

Tears stung my eyes,
mingling with the sweat already there,
salted water cloaking me.
I pulled harder, determined,
that because of me she would not fall.

She wanted to fall,
and she wanted to be helped.
She wanted to let go
and she needed someone to keep holding her
Anyways.

Layers of skin raked off my hands
by the burn of the rope,
the heaviness of her weight.
It was hard - holding on was agony
but I didn't want to let go;
I would never let go.
Part of her screamed help me,
part of her screamed let me go.
In the tumult of confusion,
I chose to listen to her call for aid,
and because if it,
I will never let this rope go.