These Butterflies Will Never Die

by Lune de ma vie   Aug 24, 2015


The birds once sung in harmony,
lying in a field of flowerbeds where we were dreamers, believers in l'amour vrai.
Unified the same way swans are when in love, but now only vultures peck the debris of memories.
Harmonizing the insanity echoing in my mentality,
multiplying my asininity, failing day by day.
Inadequate to comprehend,
ignored her requests, a vexation of ignorance that's me.
Eyes sewn shut, ears corked, my hands possessed;
these idle hands never cease to lull the cyber chatter.
How pathetic is it I can't stop them from coming to a grinding halt?

I've become a constant qualm,
a thorn in her side.
Overbearing in my affection, a storm cloud hurricane of destruction;
silent tears come into sight, flooding out of her chestnut chocolate eyes
cascading against her olive cheeks weeping in despair as the river overflows.
She suffocates because of me,
metaphorically trapped in an hourglass, turned upside down unable to breathe.
Exhaling air, inhaling a sort of ecru sand corroded in its texture, capacity batting her lungs all because of me.

Where did things go wrong?
My fragile heart is on her sleeve splintering, bleeding, and I'm pleading.
I may be chutzpah but my paucity of respect for her space is gadfly as a mosquito yearning for sweet crimson claret.
Disgusted, embarrassed, and ashamed by my actions
I've dug my own grave with each impetuous word escaping from my mouth as my tongue lashes out;
hastily trying to recapture and wolf down the word vomit like alphabet soup
but it's always too late and now I must lay in this shameful state
burying myself inside this grave.

I'm giving this my everything
but my foot needs to come off the gas, this isn't Speed Racer alas
I've been locked on the finish line for far too long.
Acting like a kamikaze pilot anticipating the crash,
this self-destruction must surcease.
I've got to let go, give her the space to flourish on her own.
It doesn't mean we'll never be unless I continue to torture her psychology;
it's a sense of hysteria, a bone-chilling dilemma she's in.

I will take my guilt-ridden bow out of her life.
Apologies can't suffice due to the interminable round-the-clock asphyxiating questions,
bombarding her like vicious carnivores stalking their prey.
This isn't a game,
it's a life!
I'm truly sorry and shamefaced.
Forgetting we all need time alone to sprout, thrive, and grow.
I'll let her escape, to run, to finally be free,
no more this anchor called 'Justin' will weigh her down;
the last thing I want is her to drown.

I'll always believe we can make it,
I'll fight forevermore from a distance.
Don't give up on me, don't give up on us, don't give up on love,
or the universal twin flame contract agreed upon from up above.
I'll keep dreaming and praying
we'll connect again in this life or the next,
a bona fide love eternal and true,
my heart and the key is given to her.
Till the sun sets in the east and rises in the west she'll have all of me.
For you Emma,
these butterflies will never die.

4


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Latest Comments

  • 7 years ago

    by Rsan

    A very excellent writing...it'd be just as great if this Emma would be here ti read as well...It was a quite a little drag on my end for I hadn't known some of the vocabularies either ways its a breathtaking piece and I've come to take hold of some new vocabularies

  • 8 years ago

    by Sunshine

    Sad poems are soaring this week.
    An amazing poem. For a long piece, this was very thrilling and soothing with all its sadness.

    Loved the tribute at the end, it just made it all very personal and sincere.

    The narrative tone gave it a unique structure which could have went odd, but I enjoyed reading it word by word.

    Very touching.
    Thank you for sharing.

  • 8 years ago

    by DarkLight

    Wow!

  • 8 years ago

    by -Choke-On-MY-Halo-

    It was quite long and since I am finally giving up on poetry because it seems to allude me, I read this poem (story in my eyes) from start to end and it hurt at times because it's quite simply put in two lines:

    "She's hurting because of me, so I need to set her free.

    This is love not war so we'll see each other again one day."

    If I'm wrong do correct me. There were some phrases I had to Google up since I only speak in Spanish and English not French or another language but that was my fault. This is may sound really mean but it could've been put more simply, I sometimes don't like it when people give me a story that could be done in 5 sentences easily, but I can understand where you are coming from a broken heart will often times make anyone drag out what they truly feel inside and others have to read between the lines to get to the purpose.

    I nominated this poem not because I hated it for being too long but because this is a story that's really relatable to some people others will wonder why I nominated this poem but I know I choose one that has a story, who's foundation was made solid and then made a home for these words to rest in good job!

    - Moria Bella Bair

  • 8 years ago

    by BeautifulSoul

    I agree with saffie, There is so much you can say about this poem, The obvious is, this seems to filled with metaphors and feelings about a person who has their heart broken and knowing your story I know that this is true. Love does come and go though, but I know you were so in love with this person, and this poem seems to let your feelings out and it seems like you feel like it is your fault. But of course it is not your fault at all, I also agree with saffie, though it is long it makes an impact on the reader and makes the main character out to be saved, and you feel guilty about how much they have gone through to get to this point in their life. I really love your title too, Butterflies always appear when you fall in love even if it is not for the first time. Overall this poem does a great job in detailing the emotions of love and how you feel when good love can go bad. 5/5