Hopeless

by Kate   Mar 19, 2020


It’s like you’re fire in my blood
Setting aflame the moth wings in my stomach
That were long constrained by spider webs
They’re not the beautiful butterflies
Or the giggly feeling that bubbles to my throat
When someone occupies every corner of my mind

They’re filled with dread, melancholy in color
A nagging fear that I’m still not enough
Until my happiness turns to unease
I can hear your laughter like an echo in my head
And it distorts from pleasure to pain with the repetition
Until I feel that your words are out of pity

Yet another hopeless crush
That feels like cruel fingers wrapped around my heart
Unsure if it’s racing out of excitement
Or fear of the impending rejection
Until I shut down, lights out like a switch
Until I’m turned off and fold back into myself
And the moths are at rest again

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