I love it. I know what it's like to just keep pressing on and then when you think you've found something, it's not what you hoped or what it seems or it's something so ridiculous you just have no one to blame but yourself. Take care!
Wow, this jumped out to me the most - "Full of only love, I say".
That is so touching and emotional that you try to make it into a positive, re-defining it.
I hate that we as humans can give and give and no one notices that light, that light that is disappearing. So eventually we are back to the darkness you mention, because we need others to fill us too. To honor us and listen to us and understand we are worthy, too. We are not just vessels to be used and discarded.