Eclipsed

by Star   Aug 12, 2020


All sorts of tiny creatures chirped,
and you hummed to their music
with your raspy voice.

Your were traced by fireflies so
I could only see your silhouette.

You presented me with purple roses
that were stained by your blood;

as the river of ominous waters
flowed beside us.

3


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Latest Comments

  • 2 months ago

    by hiraeth

    I like this piece a lot. The title sets it to be ominous and you present a shadowy character in this poem, you don't offer any description of them, as fireflies surround them, making them a silhouette, they offer you blood-stained roses; purple ones at that, indicating that this was love at first sight, or was supposed to be that since their blood is on it, it indicates they've been through hardships in their quest to court/love you. What you do offer is key - you say the river is ominous, and that means you don't trust that person fully which relates back to the title. As short as this piece is, you've put a lot of effort into it, and I genuinely enjoyed reading this :)

    • 2 months ago

      by Star

      There was a picture in my head that I was trying to portray, and i think you got it.
      Thank you ^_^

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