I'm not worthy

by Emi   Jan 10, 2021


What do you do when you're falling a part
when all the young couples break your heart?
When the green eyed monster rares its ugly head
for you yearn love though its a word you dread.
What do you do when tears always fall
for every man you care about has made you feel small.
How can you love when you wear your heart on your sleeve,
when every man you've known walks all over you, then leaves?
Why is it me that always get treated like dirt do I not deserved to be treasured?
Why can't a man just love me for me instead of until they get pleasured?

©Emi

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  • 1 week ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    "I'm not worthy" is one of those statements that some people, myself included, will just say simply "of course you're not, you are worth more!" Although this is right and you are, there is a history here. I read a poem where this statement is given evidence. Not only is there evidence, there is also evidence of self-awareness. It's not like you are saying, "why me?" You know that 'wearing your heart on your sleeve' will leave you vulnerable, but perhaps the questions is, how can I respect myself and not hold my love back? No-one should make anyone feel small. So, why do they do this? This can be for a number of reasons; they are selfish, they are not yet ready to commit and did not make this clear in the beginning. If only we had contracts to sign before going on 2nd base! lol Imagine, the couple meet and have dinner together, after the main course out come the contracts: His - I just want sex, Her - I want to meet a soul mate and have sex. Why can't we communicate more clearly? I think we can, we just need to be confident in speaking up. If we had the main course then said, shall we see each other again as I am unsure and have been hurt in the past. On the 2nd date, you go to the cinema (pre-covid - lol) afterwards, you both agree that you like one another and so agree to a 3rd date. I guess where I am going with this, waiting for sex is no bad thing, it will help weed out the people who just want that. As for the many other reasons a person can make you feel small, I think, you cannot not stop a person saying or doing something to do this, but what you can do is, tell them this is not acceptable and if they continue, I would argue, they are not right for you. Life is tough enough without others making it worse. I have spent many years alone and I remember my 'green eyed monster' I would look at couples holding hands/kissing and want that so bad. That was at a time when I wasn't enough. It has taken lots of self-development to get to the stage where I like myself. Em, you are treasure and if anyone treats you otherwise, is not worthy of your love!
    Your rhyming poem has resonated with me and I am sure will do so with many others.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0yIf9Tkgu4
    ^
    here's a little time out for you x