Why And How

Waterfalls of tears stain virgin eyes.
Plastered on her cheeks, a smile,
To swallow her up in a disguise.

Her outer purity and kindness unfolds.
She curls inside her mind in fear,
As her heart begins to grow with molds.

Her fragile heart exposes unbelievable trust.
Hidden within her sorrow and stress,
She could simply end it all with a thrust.

Tangled are her fingers around her hair.
Darkness of unfair likeness and insanity,
And being ignored and unloved with no care.

Screams of help call out from a dying heart.
She holds strong against hardships scarringly,
Her cries tried to reach everyone at the start.

Trust became a game of win or lose.
Her eyes were covered with tear curtains.
Intoxicating her lungs with liquor and booze.

She believed she could stand tall forever,
But now her status is far below short.
Attempting murder was her case,
As she sat emotionless at her court.

"God," she whispered calmly to oneself,
A raindrop from her eye on her cheek.
"You made me extremely strong,
But now You crushed me weak."

"Can I ever forgive myself?
Foolish, immature, and burnt I may be now...
But You kept me alive today and then...
And I ask why and mostly how?"

"Never had I imagined once,
That this would happen to me.
But I don't know my future now,
Or what next is going to be."

"I was torned and used,
Unloved and dying...
My soul was gone...
Those nights I sat up crying."

"God...You hold the key and path,
You can rescue me now...
But why didn't I die then?
Why and how?"