I hate myself

I hate myself

in a hole, to solidify..

recreating the ground thats been dug up.

the ground symbolizes my past,

and i want to recreate all that's in it.

i will turn a blind eye.

oblivious to the truth.

building a new identity.

only to rupture it again.

don't you see me struggle?

don't you see me in need?

you watch me all the time.

how can you mistake my pain?

so I'm back again,

with a new plan.

this time i will show the world what i really am....

i am a liar

i am a bigot

i am a racist

i am a homophobic

i hate my family

i hate my life

i hate all my achievements

and i hate that i still try to strive.

how can you blame me?

to want to recreate my past?

to recreate my everything?

i don't belong here, the way i am, i need to start over...

I'm just not sure that i can.