The Knocks At The Door

by Toni   Apr 23, 2006


Tears and nightmares are all I have now
To remind me of that day
And though the fear has passed, I know
The memories will always stay

The knocks at the door at half past 5
Sounds of footsteps at my door
One by one surrounding me
As I sat huddled on my bedroom floor

And I knew even before they spoke to me
Just why they 'had' to come
I tried to hold it together but when they spoke
My whole world came undone

After fifteen days of starving myself
Two days on a drip in a hospital bed
They decided hospital was where I 'should be'
They weren't offering a cure, just locking me up instead

I wanted so bad to scream and to cry
As I heard them say those words
But all the tears had finally run dry
And my voice has left unheard

The nurse came and told me to pack my bags
I was to go in that very night
And I would be sectioned straight away
If I even tried to put up a fight

They didn't understand I was just trying to find
A way to ease the memories and pain
To them I was suicidal, 'in need of hospital care'
And I didn't stop shaking, I was so afraid

The social worker came to escort us in
Straight to the acute psychiatric ward
The unit with the bolted doors and guards
The place where people are locked in, not cured

And I sat shaking on a chair in a little room
Whilst they filled in all of the forms
And put me on a level 1, a person an arms reach away
Before showing me to my dorm

They should have known hospital would make it worse
And that my scars would only grow
But they all refused to listen to my voice
If they'd only listened, they'd have known

One by one, everyone headed towards the doors
'Goodbye's resounded through the pain
And I as stood and watched those doors close
I knew nothing would be the same again

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by Cuddles

    This is horrible! Not the poem...the experience. I would pretty much die of fear. It's so frightening, but it's an amazing poem. Excellent write!

  • 17 years ago

    by BleedingAngel

    Hay hunni, I have missed your poems...and I am so sorry to read that you are in so much pain. I really felt your pain and frustrations in the poem, broke my heart!! I can relate in so many ways...I am always here for you, don't you forget.

    All of my love - Sabrina

  • 17 years ago

    by TormentedSoul

    Really good poem!! 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by enfant du tordu chagrin

    Wow, the pain is strongly evident all throughout this poem. Another emotional piece, and another well written poem. Good Job!

    Yours Sincerely

    Andrew Brian Kirkman